All of us know that heroes come in all shapes and sizes.What is your definition of a hero? The dictionary definition of a hero is a person of “distinguished courage or ability, admired for brave deeds and noble qualities.” If one of your medical students asked you a question “about the need to evaluate new born babies” would you immediately “jot down five points and rushed off to the Obstetrics department to try them out”?
In Aesop's Fable "The Lion and the Mouse" the hero is the tiny mouse who frees the large lion when he is caught in the ropes by the hunter. The mouse chews through the ropes freeing the lion. The mouse proved all though he was small he could be a friend to the mighty lion.
Virginia Apgar began to learn the violin and cello at 6 years of age and played concerts with her older brother on piano and with her Dad, scientist and inventor, Charles Apgar on piano. In 1933 Virginia Apgar became "one of Columbia University's first female M.D.'s" she specialized in the male-dominated area of medicine surgery. She became tired of the chauvinism she was experiencing during her internship and decided to switch her focus the new field of anesthesiology. In 1949 she became the first full professor of anesthesiology at Columbia.
One day a medical student of Dr. Apgar asked her "about the need to evaluate newborn babies." Dr. Apgar said, "That's easy, you'd do it like this." She grabbed the nearest piece of paper, jotted down the 5 points of her Apgar Score and then rushed off to O.B Obstetrics & Gynecology to try it out."
What are Dr. Virginia Apgar's 5 point Score for new born babies?
1) Appearance, skin color
2) Pulse, heart rate
3) Grimace, reflex irritability
4) Activity, muscle tone
5) Respiration, breathing
Dr. Apgar's name is the Pneumonic. As a physician she assisted in over 17,000 births. She was a lifelong musician always carrying her viola or cello with her to play chamber music with other amateur musicians in the Cities she was lecturing in. She also crafted musical instruments a violin, viola and cello.
Dr. Virginia Apgar knew from her research that birth is most dangerous time of life. Her Apgar Score quickly assessed the overall health of new borne babies saving the lives of millions of new born babies each year. When Dr. Apgar was alerted to a problem she immediately thought of how to solve it.
What are the 3 secrets to becoming your own hero?
1) Be a good listener and be observant. Be both interested and curious about solving a problem.
2) Always have a paper and pencil ready, where ever you are, in case you think of a solution to your problem. Think of yourself as a detective like Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson and look for your solution at work or at home.
3) Have a burning desire to help others and you will be giving yourself the best gift of all, caring about others.
by Dr. Madeline Frank
Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist.She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show".
If you need a speaker contact Madeline at mfrankviola@gmail.com
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Negotiating for my life on top of the world!
It might not be the highest point of the world but it seemed like it while the roofer was holding me up for more money.
Have you ever had to deal with a person who was toxic and difficult on one of your jobs?
I have had the pleasure of working with the best conductors and musicians around the world as you have read in my last article. In my families Construction and Management company I have had the privilege of working with some of the finest roofers, plumbers, electricians, carpenters, brick layers, and other construction personnel for over 20 years. All roofs are supposed to keep us dry in our houses and offices.
I arrived at our job site to inspect and video the progress of the new flat roofs on the buildings we own and manage. The ladder was set up and I climbed up to the first roof with my video camera to record the progress of the first roof.
I should mention that I am a woman, 5 foot 11 inches tall, and weigh 140 pounds. After arriving on the roof, I started to video the progress of the new flat roof when I realized there were bubbles and gaps in the roof. Meanwhile the roofer, a lean linebacker type, was coming my way. I knew he was stronger than me and could easily throw me off the roof in anger.
He said, “I need $3,000 right this minute”! He tried to threaten me by moving me to the edge of the roof. He was so angry! I remained calm, looked him in the eye and reminded him he had received his payment three days ago and that he needed to fix the gapes and bubbles in the membrane so he could receive more money.
I explained I did not carry that amount of money with me as there was no ATM on the roof. I continued to remain calm and looking him in the eye and did not turn my back to him. Eventually he moved away and I moved to another section of the roof and decided to photograph the progress of the other roofs this roofer was not working on at that moment. The roofer knew who I was and had decided he would try to frighten me.
Every few days I would return to check the progress of the roofs and video them. When the roofs were finally completed we breathed a sigh of relief.
What are the 3 secrets I learned about dealing with toxic people in a difficult situation?
1) Look the person in the eye. Always remain calm. Let the difficult person vent. Listen carefully to them without interrupting and do not argue with them - simply listen. When they have finished speaking do not judge or accuse them.
2) Remember, you are not anyone’s personal door mat to be personally bullied. Suggest solutions and the steps for solving the problem. Remember to follow through on the solutions you have agreed on.
3) Realize you cannot solve every problem.
by Dr. Madeline Frank
Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist. She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show". If you need a speaker contact Madeline at mfrankviola@gmail.com
Have you ever had to deal with a person who was toxic and difficult on one of your jobs?
I have had the pleasure of working with the best conductors and musicians around the world as you have read in my last article. In my families Construction and Management company I have had the privilege of working with some of the finest roofers, plumbers, electricians, carpenters, brick layers, and other construction personnel for over 20 years. All roofs are supposed to keep us dry in our houses and offices.
I arrived at our job site to inspect and video the progress of the new flat roofs on the buildings we own and manage. The ladder was set up and I climbed up to the first roof with my video camera to record the progress of the first roof.
I should mention that I am a woman, 5 foot 11 inches tall, and weigh 140 pounds. After arriving on the roof, I started to video the progress of the new flat roof when I realized there were bubbles and gaps in the roof. Meanwhile the roofer, a lean linebacker type, was coming my way. I knew he was stronger than me and could easily throw me off the roof in anger.
He said, “I need $3,000 right this minute”! He tried to threaten me by moving me to the edge of the roof. He was so angry! I remained calm, looked him in the eye and reminded him he had received his payment three days ago and that he needed to fix the gapes and bubbles in the membrane so he could receive more money.
I explained I did not carry that amount of money with me as there was no ATM on the roof. I continued to remain calm and looking him in the eye and did not turn my back to him. Eventually he moved away and I moved to another section of the roof and decided to photograph the progress of the other roofs this roofer was not working on at that moment. The roofer knew who I was and had decided he would try to frighten me.
Every few days I would return to check the progress of the roofs and video them. When the roofs were finally completed we breathed a sigh of relief.
What are the 3 secrets I learned about dealing with toxic people in a difficult situation?
1) Look the person in the eye. Always remain calm. Let the difficult person vent. Listen carefully to them without interrupting and do not argue with them - simply listen. When they have finished speaking do not judge or accuse them.
2) Remember, you are not anyone’s personal door mat to be personally bullied. Suggest solutions and the steps for solving the problem. Remember to follow through on the solutions you have agreed on.
3) Realize you cannot solve every problem.
by Dr. Madeline Frank
Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist. She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show". If you need a speaker contact Madeline at mfrankviola@gmail.com
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
How to deal with difficult and toxic people at work and at home!
Have you ever met anyone who was always mean and nasty no matter what? Have you ever had to deal with a person who was toxic and difficult?
Toxic people have many of the following traits: unhappiness, loneliness, depression, jealousy, and low self-esteem. Their way of coping is to be overbearing, controlling, and bossy to anyone nearby.
I have had the privilege of working with the finest Conductors in the world as a musician. When I arrived on tour in a new City the visiting foreign Conductor asked me the following three questions before the first rehearsal: “You are not French? You are a woman? You are an American?”
I looked him in the eye and replied calmly and politely to each question. “No I am not French. Yes, I am a woman and yes, I am an American.”
I realized at that moment that the guest conductor did not like women from America. At rehearsals he spoke to the orchestra musicians in a toxic manner and I actually saw the musicians cringe. His tone of voice said it all. He spoke to me in English and I felt no warmth coming from this man. I realized I had finally met my “Waterloo”.
He wanted complete control of the interpretation of the Concerto I was playing, even though he told me he had never conducted it before. I had played this Concerto many times before with marvelous warm hearted conductors.
The orchestra was a very talented one and the principal cellist, a woman, smiled encouragingly at me when the conductor was being his usual toxic self at a rehearsal one day. Her smile said, “take heart everything will be fine just do your best.”
I knew as a visitor to a foreign country I needed to be polite, calm and careful. I listened to the Conductor’s suggestions and did my best to satisfy him during rehearsals. He wanted things done his way. I knew on the day of the concert he would have to follow me and he would not be able to be difficult and toxic in front of an audience.
The concert went very well and the orchestra and I were all smiling at the audience. The audience gave me a standing ovation and three vases of roses were brought up after our performance. At that moment I felt totally free of the toxic conductor and decided immediately to play three encores for the audience and bring them a few more minutes of beautiful music. The three selections were Massenet’s “Meditation from Thais”, Lehar’s “Waltz” and “Autumn Leaves”.
The Conductor’s expression was not a happy one as he was no longer in control of the situation. To me sharing music should always be a joyful experience.
What are the 3 secrets I learned about dealing with toxic and difficult people?
1) Look the person in the eye. Always remain calm, show respect to the toxic person, and insist on respect in return. When you remain calm the angry toxic person will be neutralized.
2) Remember, you are not any ones personal door mat to be personally bullied. Walk away when you are being verbally abused.
3) Let the difficult toxic person vent. Listen carefully to them without interrupting and do not argue with them - simply listen. When they have finished speaking do not judge or accuse them. Suggest solutions and the steps for solving the problem. Remember to follow through on the solutions you have agreed on.
by Dr. Madeline Frank
Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist. She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show".
If you need a speaker contact Madeline at mfrankviola@gmail.com
http://www.madelinefrankviola.com/
http://ezinearticles.com/?id=3217661
Toxic people have many of the following traits: unhappiness, loneliness, depression, jealousy, and low self-esteem. Their way of coping is to be overbearing, controlling, and bossy to anyone nearby.
I have had the privilege of working with the finest Conductors in the world as a musician. When I arrived on tour in a new City the visiting foreign Conductor asked me the following three questions before the first rehearsal: “You are not French? You are a woman? You are an American?”
I looked him in the eye and replied calmly and politely to each question. “No I am not French. Yes, I am a woman and yes, I am an American.”
I realized at that moment that the guest conductor did not like women from America. At rehearsals he spoke to the orchestra musicians in a toxic manner and I actually saw the musicians cringe. His tone of voice said it all. He spoke to me in English and I felt no warmth coming from this man. I realized I had finally met my “Waterloo”.
He wanted complete control of the interpretation of the Concerto I was playing, even though he told me he had never conducted it before. I had played this Concerto many times before with marvelous warm hearted conductors.
The orchestra was a very talented one and the principal cellist, a woman, smiled encouragingly at me when the conductor was being his usual toxic self at a rehearsal one day. Her smile said, “take heart everything will be fine just do your best.”
I knew as a visitor to a foreign country I needed to be polite, calm and careful. I listened to the Conductor’s suggestions and did my best to satisfy him during rehearsals. He wanted things done his way. I knew on the day of the concert he would have to follow me and he would not be able to be difficult and toxic in front of an audience.
The concert went very well and the orchestra and I were all smiling at the audience. The audience gave me a standing ovation and three vases of roses were brought up after our performance. At that moment I felt totally free of the toxic conductor and decided immediately to play three encores for the audience and bring them a few more minutes of beautiful music. The three selections were Massenet’s “Meditation from Thais”, Lehar’s “Waltz” and “Autumn Leaves”.
The Conductor’s expression was not a happy one as he was no longer in control of the situation. To me sharing music should always be a joyful experience.
What are the 3 secrets I learned about dealing with toxic and difficult people?
1) Look the person in the eye. Always remain calm, show respect to the toxic person, and insist on respect in return. When you remain calm the angry toxic person will be neutralized.
2) Remember, you are not any ones personal door mat to be personally bullied. Walk away when you are being verbally abused.
3) Let the difficult toxic person vent. Listen carefully to them without interrupting and do not argue with them - simply listen. When they have finished speaking do not judge or accuse them. Suggest solutions and the steps for solving the problem. Remember to follow through on the solutions you have agreed on.
by Dr. Madeline Frank
Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist. She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show".
If you need a speaker contact Madeline at mfrankviola@gmail.com
http://www.madelinefrankviola.com/
http://ezinearticles.com/?id=3217661
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Law School Homework at 8 Years Old
How to live your dream and get your children to do their homework?
My Momma always wanted to be a lawyer like her Daddy, my Grandpa Leader. Year after year my Daddy said, “I’m sorry we just don’t have the money for you to go to law school maybe next year.”
My Daddy was a medical doctor, a surgeon, and his patients were fishermen and farmers so they paid him in vegetables or fresh fish. We always had plenty to eat just no money for law school.
My Momma had waited over eight years to go to law school and one day she made an appointment with the Dean of the local law school. The Dean said “If you can get A’s in both of these Law classes you will be given a scholarship to attend law school.
Momma got A’s in both classes. She studied really hard. She had gotten into Harvard Law School years before, but my parents didn’t have the money for both of them to go to school at the time.
Momma arranged her law classes so she would be home when my older brother and I got home from elementary school. She’d have milk and cookies on the dining room table for my brother and I and she would join us with her coffee.
We would all study together every day after school. Momma had her law books to study and my brother and I had our homework from elementary school to study. If you had a question Momma would say very softly, “How about opening your book and looking for the answer?”
As a child of 8, I remember thinking that it didn’t feel quite so lonely and awful anymore to sit and do our homework because Momma was right there with us doing her home work too. We worked together for three years until Momma finished law school at the top of her class.
My Momma, Romayne Leader Frank, was one of the first women to graduate Law School at the College of William & Mary Law School. She practiced Family Law & Real Estate Law for 38 years helping others.
Strong lessons learned: My Momma dreamed of being a lawyer and though she didn’t have the money for law school she found a way to have her dream. She was willing to study hard to prove she was worthy of a Law scholarship.
My Momma believed in education and because she was sitting down to do her homework we would do ours too! Just by Momma being there you were encouraged to do your best because you knew Momma was doing her best.
My Momma taught us to never give up on living your dream of becoming a lawyer and on inspiring your children to do their homework. Momma taught us to keep looking and thinking and you will find a way to solve your problems and if you want something badly enough you will study and work hard enough to get it.
Momma was our role model. She was willing to lead us by example and show is how to study, how to learn, how to think, and how to reason out our problems.
My Momma never gave up on anything and neither should you!
by Dr. Madeline Frank
Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist. She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show".
http://www.madelinefrankviola.com/
http://ezinearticles.com/?id=3217661
My Momma always wanted to be a lawyer like her Daddy, my Grandpa Leader. Year after year my Daddy said, “I’m sorry we just don’t have the money for you to go to law school maybe next year.”
My Daddy was a medical doctor, a surgeon, and his patients were fishermen and farmers so they paid him in vegetables or fresh fish. We always had plenty to eat just no money for law school.
My Momma had waited over eight years to go to law school and one day she made an appointment with the Dean of the local law school. The Dean said “If you can get A’s in both of these Law classes you will be given a scholarship to attend law school.
Momma got A’s in both classes. She studied really hard. She had gotten into Harvard Law School years before, but my parents didn’t have the money for both of them to go to school at the time.
Momma arranged her law classes so she would be home when my older brother and I got home from elementary school. She’d have milk and cookies on the dining room table for my brother and I and she would join us with her coffee.
We would all study together every day after school. Momma had her law books to study and my brother and I had our homework from elementary school to study. If you had a question Momma would say very softly, “How about opening your book and looking for the answer?”
As a child of 8, I remember thinking that it didn’t feel quite so lonely and awful anymore to sit and do our homework because Momma was right there with us doing her home work too. We worked together for three years until Momma finished law school at the top of her class.
My Momma, Romayne Leader Frank, was one of the first women to graduate Law School at the College of William & Mary Law School. She practiced Family Law & Real Estate Law for 38 years helping others.
Strong lessons learned: My Momma dreamed of being a lawyer and though she didn’t have the money for law school she found a way to have her dream. She was willing to study hard to prove she was worthy of a Law scholarship.
My Momma believed in education and because she was sitting down to do her homework we would do ours too! Just by Momma being there you were encouraged to do your best because you knew Momma was doing her best.
My Momma taught us to never give up on living your dream of becoming a lawyer and on inspiring your children to do their homework. Momma taught us to keep looking and thinking and you will find a way to solve your problems and if you want something badly enough you will study and work hard enough to get it.
Momma was our role model. She was willing to lead us by example and show is how to study, how to learn, how to think, and how to reason out our problems.
My Momma never gave up on anything and neither should you!
by Dr. Madeline Frank
Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist. She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show".
http://www.madelinefrankviola.com/
http://ezinearticles.com/?id=3217661
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Did you ever fail out of school?
As an 8 year old child, I was failing out of school. I was unable to read. My Momma, Romayne Leader Frank , Never, Never gave up on me. She tried every type of reading class available, and still …..I was unable to read.
One my passions at 8 years of age, was climbing trees. I was your typical tomboy and I was fearless. For me no tree was too high . The only problem was I’d wind up being rushed to the hospital several times a week for stitches on a regular basis.
The final time I was rushed to the hospital, after my reading class during summer camp, I had climbed a tall tree with nails and a board sticking out of the top of its trunk. As I came down the tree, I was scooped up by a camp counselor and rushed to the hospital. At the time I did not realize it, but blood was dripping down my leg.
One of the camp counselors called my Momma. She drove for over 3 hours to the hospital and by the time she arrived she had decided it was time to "get me out of those trees and on the ground."
My Momma knew I had wanted to study the violin for several years. She and I made a deal at the hospital. I promised to give up climbing all trees and she would arrange for violin lessons. As soon as I began to study the violin, I learned to hold the violin ,to hold the bow, to read the notes on the page, and to play music. I also learned how to take care of my violin and bow and to clean it after playing it.
I really enjoyed playing the violin and by the end of the summer the light bulb had flipped on and I was reading and going to the library. I am proud to say, I have not climbed a tree since I was 8 years old.
Strong lessons learned: My Momma believed in two things, unconditional love for her family and education. She taught us to keep looking and thinking and you will find a way to solve your problems and if you want something bad enough you will study and work hard enough to get it.
Giving up is never an option.
My Momma never gave up on anything and neither should you!
I've come a long way from being an 8 year old tomboy who was falling out of trees , failing out of school, and unable to read. Learning the violin taught me to read and write and most of all how to think. My violin has taken me all the way through a Ph.D. at Walden University, two degrees at the Juilliard School in NYC, and the privilege to work at the Metropolitan Opera, New York City Opera, playing for Frank Sinatra, Lou Rawls, Natalie Cole at Carnegie Hall and Paul Anka, the O’Jays and Eartha Kitt.
For over 25 years I have worked with children and adults to overcome problems in learning and memory through my music. I write a monthly newsletter “Madeline’s Monthly Article & Musical Tips” and a monthly radio show “Madeline’s One Minute Musical Radio Show”.
http://www.madelinefrankviola.com/
Posted by Madeline Frank, Ph.D.
One my passions at 8 years of age, was climbing trees. I was your typical tomboy and I was fearless. For me no tree was too high . The only problem was I’d wind up being rushed to the hospital several times a week for stitches on a regular basis.
The final time I was rushed to the hospital, after my reading class during summer camp, I had climbed a tall tree with nails and a board sticking out of the top of its trunk. As I came down the tree, I was scooped up by a camp counselor and rushed to the hospital. At the time I did not realize it, but blood was dripping down my leg.
One of the camp counselors called my Momma. She drove for over 3 hours to the hospital and by the time she arrived she had decided it was time to "get me out of those trees and on the ground."
My Momma knew I had wanted to study the violin for several years. She and I made a deal at the hospital. I promised to give up climbing all trees and she would arrange for violin lessons. As soon as I began to study the violin, I learned to hold the violin ,to hold the bow, to read the notes on the page, and to play music. I also learned how to take care of my violin and bow and to clean it after playing it.
I really enjoyed playing the violin and by the end of the summer the light bulb had flipped on and I was reading and going to the library. I am proud to say, I have not climbed a tree since I was 8 years old.
Strong lessons learned: My Momma believed in two things, unconditional love for her family and education. She taught us to keep looking and thinking and you will find a way to solve your problems and if you want something bad enough you will study and work hard enough to get it.
Giving up is never an option.
My Momma never gave up on anything and neither should you!
I've come a long way from being an 8 year old tomboy who was falling out of trees , failing out of school, and unable to read. Learning the violin taught me to read and write and most of all how to think. My violin has taken me all the way through a Ph.D. at Walden University, two degrees at the Juilliard School in NYC, and the privilege to work at the Metropolitan Opera, New York City Opera, playing for Frank Sinatra, Lou Rawls, Natalie Cole at Carnegie Hall and Paul Anka, the O’Jays and Eartha Kitt.
For over 25 years I have worked with children and adults to overcome problems in learning and memory through my music. I write a monthly newsletter “Madeline’s Monthly Article & Musical Tips” and a monthly radio show “Madeline’s One Minute Musical Radio Show”.
http://www.madelinefrankviola.com/
Posted by Madeline Frank, Ph.D.
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About Me
- Madeline
- Madeline Frank, Ph.D. business owner, teacher, researcher, speaker and concert artist. She writes a monthly newsletter "Madeline's Monthly Article & Musical Tips" and a monthly radio show "Madeline's One Minute Musical Radio Show".